"A few years ago, I got a call on my cell phone from a twelve year old child from my village. He was calling me from a bus stop. He’d taken a bus into the city alone, and he was calling me to ask if I could help him find a way to go to school. Both of his parents had died of AIDS, and he had no money for tuition. I told him to stay where he was, and left work immediately to pick him up. At first I was very mad at him. He should not have travelled alone. But then I looked at him and I saw myself. I’d also been desperate to go to school after my father was killed, but we had no money. So even though I was suffering myself, I told him I would try to help him. My salary was not enough, so I tried many things to get the money. After work, I went to the landfill to hunt for recyclables. But after I paid to have them cleaned, there was no money left. Now I’m trying to make bricks. I have a small operation in the village to make bricks, and I sell them in the city. It doesn’t make much money, but it’s enough to pay tuition for the boy and three of his siblings.”
Standing by, watching
One night I had such a blissful revelation directly from his soul. The very next morning, his mistress, depression, took over and snatched my soul from me.
From sheer bliss to despair.
Check out the article about this: Global catches, exploitation rates, and rebuilding options for sharks
So I know within myself that the fibroids are back. I don’t need an ultrasound or a doctor to tell me.
I also know that I need to have my babies so I’m educating myself on pregnancy and fibroids. So far, it all seems quite positive IF I don’t have submucosal fibroids.
No one wants to have major surgery too many times, but with the advice I’ve been given, if I want to have kids I have to hurry the hell up.
Now for someone who made their husband promise when he proposed that our engagement didn’t mean we have to grow up, this was one of those freeze frame life revelations. I suddenly realised that I am those women they talk about. The ones the magazines warn to hurry up and have babies because the biological clock is ticking. “What sexist bullshit” I thought, but it’s true.
I had these plans, time was on my side. I was going to a new frontier, I was going to start afresh, follow my creativity and see where it took me. I felt time was on my side, I felt my body was in my side but these uninvited “visitors” who have made a home in my body seem unwilling to go peacefully, or even at all. There’s no point fighting as they are a part of me.
Maybe I need to change what I call them; they’re not visitors, they aren’t guests, they are part of me. They’re unwanted kids, unconceived kids.
So as circumstances change, plans change and adapt. I’m adapting but it’s a slow, mentally hard process and to be honest at the moment I’m lacking in motivation. It’s a struggle to have a productive day but I’ll get there.
At least I’m not standing still.
Over 900 people have died in West Africa in the latest outbreak, which has been declared an international health emergency by the World Health Organisation. This map shows the history of Ebola, from the first case in 1976 to the latest outbreak.
Historic ebola outbreaks
The way only the person who loves you the most in the world can hurt you with pinpoint accuracy and complete devastation.
The way it hurts them too in equal measure.
The clay turning in my hands felt so good. The instructor said how impressed she was with my pot, especially as I’m a beginner. I love this feeling, rediscovering how to create with my hands.
A lot has happened since first explosive post on brilliant Tumblr blog WISF (also featured in the latest edition of WeTheUrban) and as the blog continues to grow we see many new awe-inspiring matches continue to pour out week by week! Peep more after the jump: